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So my Grandad died, a few hours ago. I found out about ten minutes ago, and I guess I'm writing this because I have to do something, anything, but sit and think.

Because, you see, there are no songs or books or things to remind me of him, all the memories are in my head and it's very very important that I don't think right now.

I can count the times I've seen him in the past years on one hand, can count the times I've spoken to him since I was about 8 on one finger.

He's gone now, so no time left to make amends. Nothing left really to do but sit and try and find anything anything anything to distract me from the fact that he died alone.