There's a loaded gun in the wings

We're using a real gun in our play at college. Granted, we're only firing blanks but it's a real live firearm, has to be kept in a locked case and everything in case someone nicks it and holds up a bank. It's quite intriguing... Last year we had giant japanese swords for fun stage-fighting, and spears. This year it's an evil gun, or gonne if you will. It doesn't look as cool, but oh my is it tempting.

Thing is, as much as I love the drama students at my college, some of them are beginning to grate. I know that this play is meant to be fun and a bit of a laugh and that some people are really only there for the enrichment points, but really, where is the logic in standing and complaining (loudly) that the play is crap when the reason it's crap is that you're not putting any effort in! I was very close to having a catfight with this one girl. She was talking about how 'shit' the play is and how 'shit' the teachers were and how lazy the crew were. I managed to resist the urge to hit her with my fake money (long story) and said something along the lines of "the play is as good as you make it...the teachers aren't actually getting paid any extra for doing this... the crew are doing twice as many hours as we are...try and relax, don't get stressed."

I felt quite proud for not calling her a whinging little kid and telling her to shut the hell up. It was an achievement of willpower. So, I wandered off to visit Liz across the stage.
"How's ye doing Fi?"
"Not too bad... Trying to make the most of things..." It was a very boring rehearsal, I have to say. "How's you?"
"Rebecca's driving me crazy!" (Rebecca is our very shrill and patronising, if well-meaning, director)
"I know!" I hissed, my mask of goodness slipping, "I swear, that loaded gun is looking more and more tempting every second..."
Me and Liz share an evil giggle. We don't mean it. Rebecca's irritating but she's not that bad, i have no intention of attempting to murder her. I'm not even considering it that seriously. But...
The girl next to Liz chimes in.
"I'm sorry, but you guys are so bitchy, Rebecca's doing her best, leave off can't you?"

DOH! I think I was just told. Now I feel stupid, and kind of annoyed. I'm getting into such a righteous rage about the excessively negative first years that it's making me snippy and bitchy, causing aforementioned first years to put me well and truly in my place. We live, we learn. Or something.

I know what I was meant to be writing about. I was intending to do an incredibly boring but necessary 'who am I?' post. Philosophical "well who really knows who they are in this crazy life anyway" ramblings aside, I'll make it short and sweet.

My name is Fiona Kennedy. Also known as: Feebz; Febo; Fatass-Fi; Sackbut; Angelic Fruicake (though not often); Mugwump; Bible-bashing liberal. I am 17 years old and I'm living with my parents in Yateley, Hampshire, England. I'm doing the second year of my A-levels at Farnborough 6th Form College, have applied to do a gap year before going to study drama at university. I've been a Christian for... *counts* 17 months (wow) and I can honestly say, difficult as it's been, that becoming a Christian was the best decision I ever made. This is not a testimony, it's just something you have to know about me to figure out where I'm coming from. My favourite colour is green. Closely followed by red but I think they clash. My favourite flowers are tulips and freesias. If I grow up, I'd like to be a princess. If not, I'll stay working at Tesco until my brain frazzles and my soul decides to emigrate. I'm kind of a geek, in that I voluntarily read history books and know far too much about Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings. However, my close friends at college (the self-named 'Nerd Herd') tell me that I'm not actually geeky enough to be a geek. I talk far too much, swear too much, eat too much, giggle too much, rant too much and get tired too often. I'm irritating as hell but if you stand still long enough I'll write you a humorous limerick and you'll get over it. You can call me Fi: I sometimes forget to wash behind my ears but you'll learn to love me. : )

Quote of the day: "What actually is a hobo? Because I get called it quite often and I'm not sure if it's a good thing." - Harriet, an incredibly posh and incredibly ditzy English student.

"Lassitudes? Why, they're the treats you give to dogs who help you rescue children from wells!" - Paul, my very funny but very weird English teacher.

In local news... Liz has said I can use her car as a fridge during the winter months. I'm touched and overjoyed that, now that I only want hot food, cold food is suddenly abundant. I still haven't had any university offers. I'm not afraid...