2005

2005 ladies and gentleman, are we good? Is this year shaping up well for everybody? Good. Me too.

I feel I should have some massive review of the year thing going on, it's been quite a turbulent one, all things considered, I'm just not sure how to mark it. I will say that this is possibly my favourite time of year. Being a ridiculouslly analytical person, I find myself taking stock of my life pretty often. The big ones are during the summer and, obviously, new year.

My big 2003 analysis took place at Soul Survivor when I became a Christian. At the end of 2003 my thoughts were all about purity and self-esteem. This summer was SoulintheCity, which was a difficult one. The painful realisation was that I'd make a commitment to this Christian lark and, quite frankly, ballsed it up. Sick and tired of being a hypocrite, I hit the proverbial crossroads - am I gonna do this or not? Do I just give up, chuck the bible in the cupboard and stop pretending to be something I'm not but at least be honest about it, or do I try again and actually do it right this time? Needless to say, I chose option B. I spent the next few months forcefully dragging my life into line and trying to get back on the right track with God. It's been about as pleasant as trapping my earlobes in a vice but it's working, I'm doing it and every day, however much that day might seem to suck on the surface, I get a little bit closer to my God, a little bit more like the person I want to be.

So. End of 2004. What's a girl to say? Keep on keeping on. Stuff will get better, and it is getting better even now, so what complaints can I possibly have? Never has a new year and a clean slate meant more to me than this one. Yeah, I'll probably mess something up again soon, but I'm happy in the knowledge that if I do, I'm always going to have another slate to write on.

Resolutions:
1) Sort out my Sundays. If not in the morning then the evening, if not at St Peters then somewhere else - bum in Church, regularly.
2) The next few months are the last precious times of full-time education I have until October 2006, and the last I will ever have in the company of many of my weird and wonderful friends. Savour them. And do lots of work too.
3) Remain single until I've finished my exams. For all those who just let out a resounding snort, I agree with you, it probably won't happen, but I can aim high, can't I? Knowing my luck,my destined husband is gonna walk into my life with a small fortune and a big car sometime in the next week and I'm going to turn the man down. Ah well.
4) Stop drinking coke. Yes. Right. (As I type this, I am in fact sipping coke).
5) Read the bible more often. (May actually achieve this one).
6) Keep my room tidy. (You can't see, but I'm laughing right now).
7) Don't tell so many rude jokes. (Oh dear...)
8) Stop swearing. (You know where you can stick that one).

Ok. The resolutions are becoming farcical. I'll keep the important ones, I promise. Happy New Year everyone, I'm off to get some more f***ing coke.